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The form of partner dancing is everything you can learn in dance class, and by practicing, with or without a partner: moves, technique, skillful responses. The art part, you might say. The content is the connection between you & your partner; the human part. For dancing to be satisfying you need both, but never under any circumstances sacrifice content for form. Life is more important than art. Friendship is more important than dancing. Partner dance is a language, and it takes a lot of learning to get good

Being intentionally kind & generous makes partner dancing (or anything else) a way to evolve, to move closer to what everyone wants: happiness, satisfaction, fulfillment. This is not related to "falling in love with my dance partner for 3 minutes," which is self absorption, all about how wonderful it feels. Being intentionally kind & generous is a choice, not an emotional whirlwind: choosing to make my partner's happiness more important than my own, and acting on that. Intentional acts of love are powerfully evolutionary. Dancing for my partner

Partner dancing can open doors into unexplored parts of yourself. It does this by forcing you to use your mind and body together as one unit, while holding another person in your arms, moving to music. That's an awesomely potent combination of forces. What's absolutely amazing to me about partner dancing as self exploration is that you do it with a partner. You can't explore for your partner; you're each on your own voyage of discovery. But you're traveling together, supporting and encouraging each other; my favorite dance

Partner dancing is a language; if you want to be able to communicate with a partner - i.e. dance together - you have to learn the language. Focusing on the 3-way connection is a very effective way of connecting with another would-be dancer, lead or follow, and avoiding some of the bad habits beginning partner dancers develop. The 3-way connection Partner dancing is a 3-way connection: you, your partner & the music. Connecting with your partner is what partner dancing's all about; the music's job is to help you

Partner dancing can help you get what you really want out of life: happiness, fulfillment, satisfaction, love, joy, peace, all that. You just have to dance the right way: for your partner, not for you. The starting point for that is connecting with your partner; connection is founded on respect. Connect: It can be simple human warmth, full-on erotic fire, or any of a thousand other shades of feeling, but you have to connect with your partner to get anything out of partner dancing. Connection is face-to-face, heart-to-heart,

Learning to be intentionally kind & generous is the most important lesson; that's what I'm always working on. This page collects some of the other, less mission-critical lessons I'm learning from taking dance classes, dancing, teaching dance classes, and putting on dances. • The limits of lesson planning • Teach the dance, show the love • Teachers: Mini-privates are a drag • Teach the people who show up • Make room for everyone at the dance • How to find a teacher The limits of lesson planning I always have a lesson plan, and I'm

Sure, you can dance without ever connecting with your partner, but that's so lonely. Connection is the content of partner dancing; moves are just the form. Connecting is easy: just be friendly, greet your partner warmly. Here are some things to consider if you want to connect: • You have to want to dance with that person. Not just want to dance. Wanting to dance with someone is personal: you want to dance with that particular person. If you dance out of politeness or obligation or "why not?"